Happy Friday!
And welcome to Day 19!! That’s right, people; we’ve made it to the teens, and there’s no looking back. ?
I know that we discussed some fun music stuff in a recent post, and now I’m thinking that today is as good a day as any. So, what the hell. Let’s do this. ?
Close your eyes for a minute, and try to remember the last time you were singing in the car, or at home, or out on a walk or whatever. And then think of all those songs you’ve sung to yourself, all those lyrics and refrains that you just flat out butchered! (Don’t worry, friends; you’re far from alone in that regard.)
The thing is, though, now that the proliferation of the Internet has largely made the lyrics police a virtual non-entity, you just need to hit up Google for a quick check. I mean you’ve got to, right? (Yes, for any of you ‘youngins out there, there was a time when you used to have to look stuff up!)
So, as an homage to the past and to all the freestyle lyrics we’ve all been guilty of crafting over the years, let’s review a quick snapshot of a few of them. I can’t take credit (or blame, depending on your point of view!) for all of the following, but hopefully, the brief notes sections of each of these 19 songs will help
provide some context.
Without further adieu, let’s look at some classic mondegreens. (Not making that word up, I promise. By definition, a mondegreen is the mishearing of a word or phrase. AKA an aural malapropism.)
Please check out the makeshift chart:
| # | SONG TITLE & ARTIST |
ACTUAL SONG LYRICS | WHAT I/OTHERS THOUGHT I/THEY HEARD AND THEN SANG IT THAT WAY | NOTES |
| 19 | Footloose (Kenny Loggins) | Now take a hold of your soul. | Now make the loading zone. | I only found out the correct words about one year ago. I simply have no excuse for that one, though. |
| 18 | Eminence Front (The Who) | Eminence front, it’s a put on. | ‘Livin in a bump. Put your foot on. | My brother still teases me about that one. |
| 17 | The Strawberry Roan (Marty Robbins) | He’s a about the worst bucker I’ve seen on the range. | He’s about the worst fucker I’ve seen on the range. | The “b” really does sound like an “f” in an old mono recording. |
| 16 | Loosen Up My Buttons (The Pussy Cat Dolls) | Loosen up my buttons, baby. | You can’t get my butt in Spain. | That one is courtesy of my then-five-year old daughter (now age 19!), who was convinced she was correct. |
| 15 | Say It Isn’t So (Hall & Oates) | We like to be the strangers at the party, two rebels in a shell. | We like to be strangers at the party, just living on the shelf. | I always liked these guys, but they threw me off track with a few of their songs. |
| 14 | Torture (Michael Jackson) | ‘Cause I just can’t stop this feelin. It’s torture. (Three refrains) | ‘Cause I just can’t stop this feelin. Extortion. (Three refrains) | I guess the falsetto voice must have thrown me off the mark. |
| 13 | The Weight (The Band) | Crazy Chester followed me, and he caught me in the fog. He said, ‘I will fix your rack, if you’ll take jack my dog.” |
Crazy Chester followed me, and he caught me in the bar. He said, ‘I will fix your back, if you’ll go jack my car.” | In retrospect, I should have planned ahead to the next line about “feeding the dog when you can,” but otherwise I’m thoroughly embarrassed by this one. |
| 12 | Louie Louie (The Kingsmen) | Three nights and days I sail the sea. Think of girl constantly. | I know I say I’ll see her with me. She gets on a ship constantly. | Almost too far off the mark to even acknowledge this one. |
| 11 | Then of course there are misheard commercial lyrics, too…Bain de Soleil skin protection | Bain de Soleil for the San Trope tan. | Bain de Soleil for the gentle spray tan. |
Hey, it does rhyme. |
| 10 | Dragging the Line (Tommy James) | My dog Sam eats purple flowers. We ‘aint got much, but we got ours. | You can grab some purple flowers. We ‘aint got much, but we got showers. | Well, it was the 1960s. |
| 9 | Incorrect song titles (Allman Brothers) | True Gravity | True Guava (Don’t ask; far too much Everclear before show time!) |
Just imagine me trying to chug Everclear. It wasn’t pretty, people. |
| 8 | Private Eyes (Hall & Oates) | Private eyes, they’re watching you. |
Brighter than I, we’re watching you. |
See above. Stung by those Philly boys again. )-: |
| 7 | Benny and the Jets (Elton John) | Oh, but they’re weird and they’re wonderful. Oh, Bennie, she’s really keen. |
Oh, but they’re weird and so wonderful. Oh, Benny he’s ‘a really lean. | Yes, I thought Benny was a guy, an especially skinny one. |
| 6 | Reflections of My Life (Marmalade) | Oh, my sorrows, sad tomorrows, take me back to my own home. | All my sorrow said tomorrow, take me back to my alma. | Guess I must have been thinking that “alma” might be short for “alma mater,” maybe? |
| 5 | Tired of Toein’ the Line (Rocky Burnette) | Don’t know why you want to jump on me, baby, baby, baby and make me cry. |
Don’t know why you want to jump on me, baby, baby, baby I’m fit to be tied. | Another mono recording (1981) gone awry! |
| 4 | Please Mr. Please (Olivia Newton John) | Please Mr. please don’t play B-17, it was our song, it was his song, but it’s over. Please Mr. please, if you know what I mean, I don’t ever want to hear that song again. | Please Mr. please don’t play sweet Sherry Jean, it was our song, it was his song, but it’s over. Please Mr. please, if you don’t know what I mean, I ‘aint never gonna hear that song again. | I figured such a heart breaker of a song had to involve an actual name of a person vs just a number. |
| 3 | The Rapper (The Jaggerz) | Rap, rap, rap, they call him the rapper. Rap, rap, rap, you know what he’s after. | Rap, rap, rap, they call him the wrapper. Wrap, wrap, wrap, and no one comes after. | Yep, you’re reading that correctly. I thought they were singing “wrapper,” like he’ll “wrap” himself around you. Should have checked the song title. |
| 2 | Island Girl (Elton John) | He want to take you from the racket boss. He want to save you but the cause is lost. | He want to take you, but the ‘records lost, he want to break you, but there’s too much cost. | Did my best on that one. Still totally unacceptable. |
| 1 | Juke Box Hero (Foreigner) | And be a juke box hero, got stars in his eyes. | It’s ‘gotta be a two-buck funeral. His time to die. | Lisa, if you’re somewhere out there reading this, that’s still my favorite ever! |
As always, please feel free to share some of your own mondegreens with me.
Catch you tomorrow, gang.
JFish